In order to grow up, one thing you have to give up is the notion that you’re noble-hearted – the assumption, probably a sub-conscious one, that your motives in the affairs of this world are, in general, quite noble.
Stick with me, please; I don’t mean to be unduly negative, though I know it sounds like it. I believe – based on Scripture & experience – that one of the frailties of the human frame is the tendency to give ourselves a bit (or a lot) too much credit regarding the benevolence of our motives & actions.
What’s wrong with that? With “thinking positive”? With having rose colored glasses on when we look in the mirror? Here’s the problem: It distorts, even prevents, relationships. If I think that I’m amazing, & that you’re a putz, it pretty much prevents us from having a friendship. Not only that, I’m probably not growing much, personally, if I’m deluded about my own amazingness. Why would I bother? I’m already wonderful. I don’t need your (or God’s) help to improve.
The missing ingredient – in both the self-perception & the relationship – is truth. And where truth is absent – when the spot where truth belongs is filled with error – nothing can be healthy & strong. Which explains why God – who wants people to be healthy, & grow strong as whole people – is so keen to see truth in us & in our relationships. For example:
- “Behold, you delight in truth in the inward being” (Psalm 51:6, ESV)
God – who really loves, like any parent, to watch His children grow up – gets pleasure when He sees you & me get a little more fully truthful at the core. But it doesn’t just give Him pleasure; it intensifies our own pleasure:
- “If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, & you will know the truth, & the truth will set you free” (John 8 ESV, Jesus speaking, italics mine)
Minor rant: Some people, when you start to talk about the human heart, immediately jump to Jeremiah chapter 17 and how the heart is “deceitful above all things”, & it’s really all about what we do, not how we feel. Fair enough; I started off by admitting we are, as fallen human beings, prone to delusion. But God is re-forming us – you, me, & everyone else given over to Him – from the inside out:
- “For it is God who works in you to will & to act according to His good purpose” (Philippians 2:13, NIV84)
I may be – okay, I am – broken, but God is the great Restorer. There is a divine conspiracy (to borrow the late Dallas Willard’s phrase) to restore my, & your, soul. And everything else about us.
To land the plane: we tend to automatically assume that our motives are pure, to the core. They’re not. So God – not easily thwarted – takes on the lifelong project of renewing us from the inside out. The way I cooperate is to be a man of truth, including, & sometimes especially, truth about me. That means listening to the preacher, & asking, “God, is he talking about me?” And reading your Bible & asking, “God, what’s true about me?” If He knows you are a man (or woman, or youth, or child) who desires truth, He’ll keep pouring it in, displacing the lies, filling you with truth, setting you free.
It’s sometimes painful. From the words (verbatim) that I scratched down on a pad of paper in the middle of the night that spawned this blog post: “One thing you have to give up – has to be worked out of you in order to grow up in Christ – excruciatingly painfully – is cherished notions of your own nobility. You have to see & own your faults of character. Jesus brings things into the light – it may be very painful – & then He heals you“.
May that happen to me & you.
Jill Elefritz July 12, 2016
Thank you Mark! Your words remind me of a time in my life when my response was often, “I meant well” – basically excusing my own sin. I have a long way to go but know that God is growing me in knowing/experiencing my need of Him totally. “Search my heart O God…”
YFAL!
Jim Settle July 14, 2016
What a potent truth. As a 19 year old new believer I picked up Watchman Nee’s “Spiritual Man” and read, “There is no such thing as a humble young man” and “It takes years of God dealing with our soul to develop into a spiritual man” (paraphrases). It made me really angry! Coming to terms with my own wickedness is so necessary! The more honest I get the deeper he can work. Thanks bro!
Mark E. July 14, 2016 — Post Author
Thanks for this, Jim. You’ve helped me see the ugly in me, but always with a lot of grace. Thanks for being a role model for me & for pointing me to Jesus.